"I know it feels like you have all these options and when you make a decision, you lose a world of possibilities. But the reality is, until you make a decision, you have nothing at all."

America and grown-up life

I've been back in America for less than a week now, and I'm not sure how to feel about it.  It was nice seeing all my family at Christmas, and being back in familiar territory.  I'm also glad to have a car again!  That being said, I'm missing British life.  I miss Mat, and I miss British accents, and I miss having school to go to every day, and I miss hopping on the train to London, and I miss walking a million miles a day.

I'm also feeling very overwhelmed with my job/school search.  If you know me, you know I'm a control freak (yes, I'll admit it).  I hate not knowing about whether I got into grad school or not, because I can't plan the rest of my life without knowing whether I got in or not!  Very stressful.  I've been interviewing for teaching jobs in America at child care centers, but I'm not sure I want to commit to a job like that if I'm going to be leaving this summer to go back to England for school.  VERY STRESSFUL.  I just want someone to give me a non-commital, full-time, minimal responsibility job that pays well... is that too much to ask?!

Here are some final pictures from England:

My final display of student teaching!  The children all made moving pictures of rocking horse land.

Mat and I's final train ride of my time in England =(

Randy's new pool table!  I think it was secretly a welcome home present for me =)

Last days in England.

My last days in England were very sad.  I had to say bye to so many people!

First off - Tuesday at school with my kids.  The first thing little Isabel said to me on Tuesday morning was "Miss Keys we're never going to see you again."  So sad.  Then they kept saying things like "Miss Keys you're still my best friend forever" and "Miss Keys I might cry when you leave" and "Miss Keys I really like you."  I love them.  They had a special assembly to give me my going away gifts.  The kids made me a memory book with pictures of all of them and nice things they've said about me, and a flower thing with pictures they drew on it.  The school got me a Cath Kidston teapot with 5 matching mugs - very exciting.  And, they're going to ship it for me because they knew I couldn't get it in my suitcase!  My teacher also got me a Teacher's Survival Kit, which had things like bath soap and wine in it.  We had the nativity at the church that afternoon, and I managed to hold myself together saying bye to all the kids.  Then I had to say bye to all the teachers.. didn't hold myself together so well there.

Wednesday/Thursday - I spend Tuesday night in London with Mat.  We went to eat at Jamie's Italian in Covent Garden and then just hung out.  Wednesday we went back to Dorking and I finished packing.  We met Chris and Oliie (our host brothers) for a drink so we could say bye to them.  Thursday morning we were up at 510 to get ready to go.  Our train was at 617.  Mat came with us to the airport.  Otherwise I don't think Kate and I could've gotten all our suitcases on and off the train!  So heavy.  I said bye to Mat at the airport and that sucked, obviously.

On a plane for 10 hours to Atlanta, customs, re-check bags, wait 3 hours, on another plane to Minneapolis for 2 hours, get bags, 5 hour drive to Madison, finally home at midnight (6 am England time).. full 24 hours of travelling.

Also, my tonsillitis is back, so I had to go to the doctor yesterday.  They gave me different medicine, so hopefully that works this time!

That's all for now.  Merry Christmas!

Last weekend in good ol' England.

Friday -
We had a laid-back morning at school.  We did some writing and played some games.  Then, we had Christmas lunch, where the teachers sit in the hall and eat with the children.  We had popped crackers (apparently an English tradition) and ate roast.  The children thought it was so exciting!  They're starting to talk about me leaving all the time.  They keep making me dot to dots, and funny little pictures and going "Miss Keys I made this for you to take back to America."  I could wallpaper my house with dot to dots.  Mom?  Thoughts?  Little Annabelle has started telling me that I'm still her very best friend, even if I'm going back to America.  Also, the moms got me a gift.  They got me mugs and an ornament, and wrote such nice things in my card.  I'm going to miss them!

Friday night we had our staff Christmas party at the reception teacher's house.  It was really nice!  We had a bring and share so there was plenty of food, and our head teacher gave us all pretty gifts.  After that I met up with Mat and we had a drink out in Dorking.

Saturday -
Kare, Mat and I got up and went up to London for the day.  We were going to see Wicked, but the tickets were too expensive.  So we walked around London and went souvenir shopping.  Then, we spent a few hours in Harrods, the most amazing store in the world.  There is absolutely nothing you can't by in Harrods.  You could buy an elephant if you wanted to!  We looked at animals, jewellery, clothes, kitchen stuff, food.. so many things!  If I had millions of pounds, I would've spent so much money there.

After that, we went to Kings Cross Station in search of Platform 9 3/4.  We failed, because you have to buy a ticket to get onto platform 9.  A later google search revealed that they've moved Platform 9 3/4 to the street outside.  Oh well.  We also went to Hyde Park to check out Winter Wonderland.  There was no chance of getting in, because it was so crowded, but we saw the lights from outside.  London is so pretty at Christmas time.

After that, Mat and I went to meet his parents for a drink at his restaurant in Waterloo.  It was Sandy's birthday, so we chatted a bit.  Then, Mat and I set out to find Jamie Oliver's new restaurant, Union Jacks.  Little did we know that would turn into an hour long journey!  Union Jacks was supposed to be on Tottenham Court Road, so we took the tube to Tottenham Court Road.  Turns out it was in Covent Garden.  Annoying.  Then, when we got there, the place was awful!  It was hidden, and empty (on a Saturday night).  The only food on the menu was "British flats" (aka pizza) and salad.  No other main courses.  And the service was bad.  It was not an enjoyable experience!  Then it cost £25 to get a cab home.  All in all, it was a frustrating night!  Today, we stayed in and watched movies, which was much less stressful.  We watched The Inbetweeners, which is hilarious, and the last Harry Potter.  It was a nice relaxing Sunday in London!  Mat had to go to work at 5, so I came back to Dorking.

It's nice to not have any planning to do for tomorrow!  We have a Christmas party tomorrow, then a nativity at church on Tuesday.  The reception children are doing the nativity at church, so that should be really cute.  Can't wait!

Here are some pictures:

Father Christmas ornaments my children made.  They look so cute on our class tree!

Really dark, but Mat and I on Millennium Bridge in London.

I think Mat and I are going to see Wicket tomorrow night.  Tuesday night we're going to eat at Jamie's Italian in London for our final dinner out (very sad).  I'm not sure what we're going to do on Wednesday!  It's hard to plan your final day in England!  Kate and I fly back Thursday morning.

That's all for now!

Belated birthday present

Mathew got me this pretty ring for my birthday :)

3 day week.

After 4 days off I forgot how exhausting school can be!  I also forgot how all the children's happy little faces brightens my day!  They were so excited I was back.  Apparently they've been working on "a surprise for me to take back to America" and they all couldn't wait to tell me.  A few of them almost slipped and told me what is was, but Denise stopped them.  Cute little Annabelle has been telling me every 5 minutes that I'm "still her best friend" even though I was gone for so long.  Adorable.

Mat went back to London yesterday (he was on holiday last week until yesterday).. 6 days of taking care of sick, crabby Allie and he hasn't run away yet!  There must be something wrong with him! ;)  I think he's coming to America in February, which is very exciting!

Tomorrow begins my last weekend in England!  I'm not ready to leave at all.  Obviously I miss my family and I am very excited to see them.  But, I've really fallen in love with England!  The nicest, most caring people I've ever met are at my little school in Mickleham village.  Honestly.  It's like I've acquired a few sisters and about 7 grandmas!  It's going to be so hard saying bye to all of them.  I'm awful at goodbyes anyway.  If I had it my way, I'd tell them I was leaving on Tuesday, actually leave on Monday, and send them thank-you cards in the mail.  I just hate how sad it is.

It's going to be rough saying bye to Mat as well.  It's comforting to know that I'll be seeing him in a few months, but after that is so up in the air.  I know I'll see him again.. I just don't know when!  I'm going to have to win the lottery between now and April so I can afford to come back to England then.

I haven't heard about grad schools yet.  I did learn that England is passing a law in April that will make American teaching licenses compatible with a British teaching license, so I suppose that is always an option (coming back and teaching).  I just don't know what I want to do with my life!  Sometimes I feel like that's okay, and other times I feel like I need to figure it out soon.  Oh well.  I'm pretty confident things will work out.. doesn't do any good to worry about it right now :)

I'm off to "plan" my last lesson for student teaching!  I say "plan" because we're going to play a Christmas game that is sort of numeracy based.  With 2 days of term left it doesn't make much sense to have them do any serious lessons.

Side-note: If you ever run into a British person, ask them to say "jaguar" or "zebra" and then tell them it's wrong.  I'm convinced American English is better at those two words.

I'm not dead.

I'm still kicking.  I had another day off school today, as my head teacher said I needed another day to rest.  Then I got an email from Educators Abroad saying that if I miss another day of school, they'll need to give me another placement for a week to make up the time?  Seems silly, eh?  In any case, there's only 5 days of school left for the term so I think I'll make it.

My face is still red and puffy, as I'm still taking amoxycillin.  It's not pretty, but only 3 more days!

Can't wait to go back and see the kiddos tomorrow.  They probably think I went back to America without telling them!

Update.

Went to the doctor again today.  He was an idiot, but basically said that if I've taken amoxycillin before and  it was fine then it should be fine now, regardless of the adverse reaction to the penicillin.  So I got amoxycillin.  Took it.  Red puffy face, hives, and an itchy neck is what I have now.  And that doctor's appointment cost be £50!  So I'm sucking it up and taking it.  Another day off school tomorrow as well, as my head teacher said not to come in.

Back to dying.

I spoke too soon.  A little while after my last post, I got a puffy, red, itchy, hot face, probably from the penicillin.  I must have developed a penicillin allergy in the last few years?  So now I can't take that, and my throat is still disgusting, and I have a hot face to go along with it.  I just can't catch a break this weekend!

I do have to say that Mat has been an absolute angel.  I would've killed me by now if I was him.  He went to the grocery store at 4 in the morning to buy me medicine the other night, he made me chicken noodle soup, he took me to the doctor, he put up with my crying.  Seriously. Angel.  I think he's a keeper! :)

Not actually dying.

Turns out I'm not actually dying (a little dramatic, I know).  I do have tonsilitis though.  I went to an NHS walk-in centre and told them my name, and gave them Mat's address and waited for an hour and they took me back.  Then the nurse took one look in my throat, told me I had tonsilitis, went and got 3 boxes of medicine, gave them to me, and that was it.  No charge.  No heart rate checking, no getting weighed, no blood pressure.  That was it!  She did say I have blocked ears as well? Who knows. She told me to put olive oil in my ears, but I think I'll pass on that.

Now I'm teaching Mat how to make the staples of American sick diets - Chicken Noodle Soup and grilled cheese.  How can you be 27 years old and not know how to make grilled cheese?!  British people are weird.

Dyinggggg

I'm pretty confident I'm dying.  Okay not really.  But I'm really sick.

It started on Wednesday night.  All the boys were back in our house, and 2 of the 3 were vomiting a lot.  I mean, a lot.  So of course, I wake up in the middle of the night Wednesday and vomit.  I call my head teacher in the morning to tell her I'm not coming to school.  Then I realize my throat kind of hurts too.  Little did I know that that little sore throat would turn into the worst sore throat of my life.  I've been miserable since Thursday.  I can't swallow, I can't sleep, I cry a little every time I take a drink of water.  I can't eat.  I'm pretty confident it's tonsilitis (they apparently don't get strep here?).

I'm going to attempt to go to a doctor today, but I'm in London and my passport is at home in Dorking, so I'm not sure they'll take me.  If not, I guess I'll have to go back to Dorking and try to find a walk-in centre there (but I don't think there are any).  The only thing that's helped at all is ibuprofen with codeine (which you can buy over the counter).  And that's just minor relief.  I still feel like someone took a cheese grater to my throat.

Hopefully the doctor works out today!

Update!

Last weekend - 

Mat and I just hung out on Friday night.  Saturday, Kate, Mat and I went to Westminster Abbey.  Mat was thrilled about sightseeing in London on a Saturday (siiiiike).  It costs £16 to get into Westminster Abbey!  Crazy!  We did get to hear the choir sing while we were there though, so that was good.  Mat went off to work and Kate dragged me to the British Museum.  I only say dragged because I've been there before.  We saw the Rosetta Stone and the Elgin Marbles and LOTS of Greek, Roman, and Egyptian statues.  LOTS of statues.  The Olympic medals for next year were there too, but we got lost and couldn't find them to see them.  

Here are some pictures!

Westminster Abbey.

Kate and I in the cloisters at Westminster.

We couldn't open it...

I just love this.

The expression on my face tells me that Mat was probably being annoying.

British Museum.  

Just a pretty picture of London.

Saturday night we went out in Soho in London.  Kate and I went to a pub called something Irish and met some Australians.  It was a pretty fun night.  Took us ages to get a taxi back to Mat's though.  Pretty annoying.

School is going well.  It's much more relaxed now that I'm done with my observations.  Also, our school time has been taken over by Christmas play practice, so there isn't much learning going on.  The parents have started saying things to me like "Jack sure is going to miss you when you go back to America!"  It's so sad to think that I'll be leaving in 2 weeks =(

Funny story:

Last week, Jenny (my teacher, who's 33) is helping 2 little girls (Farah and Lilly) make puppets on the carpet.

Jenny: I probably won't be able to get up cause I've been sitting on the ground so long!  I'm getting old!

Farah (completely serious): Yeah sometimes I have a hard time getting up too.  Maybe it'll be easier when I'm 6.

Me:  No I think it's all downhill from 5. 

Kids are so funny.

Much better day!

Today was SO much better than the rest of this week has been!  Tony came this morning for my observation and it went really well.  He then informed me that he's seen so much improvement over the last few weeks that he doesn't need to come next week.. so today was my final observation!  SO EXCITING!  Also, a little girl's mum this morning told me that I'm her daughter's favourite teacher and she talks about me all the time.  So nice to hear after such a rough week! =)

I got to leave school right after today, and I came to London.  I managed to find my way from Dorking to Mat's flat (in Hackney) all by myself on a Friday afternoon!  My trip was a train from Dorking to Waterloo, then the tube from Waterloo to Bank, change at Bank and go to Bethnal Green, then a bus from the station to Mat's flat.  So complicated.  Now Mat's making dinner for me.  Today is shaping up to be a good day!